Monday, February 7, 2011

Carpe Diem


turn down the lights
turn down the bed
turn down these voices
inside my head
lay down with me
tell me no lies
just hold me close
don't patronize
don't patronize me
i can't make you love me if you don't
you can't make your heart feel
something' it wont
here in the dark,in these final hours
i will lay down my heart
and feel the power if you wont
no you wont
coz i can't make you love me
if you don't

verse:
I'll close my eyes
then i wont see
the love you don't feel
when your holding' me
morning will come
and I'll do whats right
just give me till then
to give up this fight
and i will give up this fight

 
Feeling a bit melancholic yesterday. Well, it is half past twelve in the morning and I have just woke up. Took a bath and ate. Last meal I took was brunch yesterday.

As I read through the lines of the song, I have come to realize that it is not just about love. I mean, you cannot make anyone love you. Or do things for you or decide for things they don't want to.

It is not as if there is no option. There is always a yes and a no. A right and a left. There is always and will always be a choice. That is what free will is about, isn't it?

I have tried to live a life without regrets. I haven't always made the right choices. More often than not, especially when I was young I always took calculated risks. I strive to be a good girl, a proper daughter, a prim lady. It was indeed no menial task for I know in my heart that I have a stubborn streak and there is a rebel inside. So when I take these chances, however right or wrong they may be, I stand up for it. And some times, though it may seem that I'm all tough, my knees will be trembling and my fingers are crossed hoping I made the right one.

As I grew older, I have learned that I have to make more choices. For I can never bring back the past, or as what if, or sulk in the corner and blame myself. Why can't everybody do that? Is it because they have everything to lose and I have none?
To change one's life:  Start immediately.  Do it flamboyantly.  No exceptions. 

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